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This term was coined by my teacher, Rosalyn Dischavio, the founder and director of the Institute of Sexuality Education and Enlightenment. Feel free to head over to their website to learn more about her definition and approach! Here, you will find that I incorporate somatic learning through breathwork, body movement, connection, arts and crafts and more. For in person classes I always have markers, paper, fidget toys, a place to sit on the floor or lay, pillows, music, art if possible. I strive to be as inclusive as possible, while also recognizing my limitations simply because I am a human being, because I believe that EVERYONE deserves sexuality education. I also treat sexuality as a living force; pleasure is physically and scientifically healing for our bodies, our needs, wants, desires and abilities are fluid and change throughout our life and THAT is addressed in all of my education. I also always position information in a way that puts YOU in the pilot's seat; YOU are the expert on your body and abilities and while I may have helpful ideas and information, ultimately you make the best decisions for your body and family. All condoms, lubricants, sex toys and more that I recommend are formulated with few ingredients and the highest tech body safe materials that are out there, without costing you an enormous amount of money. The last point I'll touch-on so I don't turn this answer into a novel is that Holistic Sex Educators believe that the Earth and all of its inhabitants impact our body and wellness; even when things like war, famine, great joy and peace aren't in our direct environment, I believe that our bodies can sense it and react to it. We are connected to everything and everyone around us and across the world. Understanding this can help us make sense of the different things we experience and how we fit into the world at whole.
I break any classes into two groups; teenagers or adults. Sometimes there are age ranges that help all of us to connect on different life milestones and developmental stages. If you aren't sure if a class is geared towards adults or teens, or what age that might include, please email me! My work is specifically designed with neurodivergent people in mind, simply because I am neurodivergent! All of my spaces and classes are LGBTQIA+ inclusive, and I use mixed pronoun language (she, her, he, him, they, them, people, partners, husbands, wives, etc.). Polyamorous, ethically non-monogamous, curious, questioning, and monogamous people are ALL more than welcome at every class! Everyone, regardless of class, race, culture, background, religion, trauma history, or ability, is welcome in my spaces. I try to offer sliding scales or pro-bono spots in all of my classes and workshops when possible to support my goal to be accessible! But when in doubt, email me ANY questions or comments you have about accessibility, or how I can make my classes more accessible. Your support and feedback and greatly appreciated
As soon as possible!! Now, to be clear, 'sex' shouldn't be the first conversation you have about sexuality wellness. I believe, as most other educators do, that children should learn about their anatomy, autonomy, communication, and boundaries starting from when they're born really! Sexuality is a topic that is SO much broader than just the mechanics of sex and contraceptives. Want to learn more about HOW to do this? Keep and eye out for classes discussing how to talk to kids of all ages about sexual wellness and body literacy
Because SO many of us (most of us) received poor sex ed as teenagers, or even later as adults. Depending on your age, you may have learned about sex primarily through porn, or through just one talk your parents had with you about how not to get pregnant. Most people didn't receive education about pleasure, consent, communication, pleasure in the presence of sexual dysfunction, how to GET pregnant, how to educate our children, how to get help or when to get help. A lot of education for adults centers around permission; permission to be who you are in your entirety, incorporate all parts of yourself in a healthy manner and find more pleasure in sex and life!
Now THAT'S a hot topic! Let's take a nice, big, deep breath before we continue........
I believe there are a lot of different ways to think and talk about gender, and that changes depending on where you are from, how you were raised, your culture or religion, or generation. I don't believe there is ONE right way to think or talk about gender, so I talk about the different ways we see it show up. I preach respect, compassion, curiosity, and bravery to both love ourselves and others regardless of the way anyone identifies AND seek information and perspectives that differ from our own. At the heart of my education, there is no right way to be, I won't tell you what to think, but everyone deserves love, compassion, respect, freedom, healthcare and safety
My approach is entirely non-religious, meaning that none of the information that I teach as fact comes from any religious ideologies. However, that doesn't mean that individuals from religious backgrounds can't join a class or workshop. In classes where it could be relevant, for instance, I might mention how some people hold the belief that waiting until marriage to have sex is important, but that would be balanced with other ideas, opinions, facts and some guiding points on how to decide what is right for your body because at the end of the day no one knows their body and themselves better than they do!
Most people don't realize this but... very few states in the U.S. require sex education to be taught at all, and multiple states require that all sex education be from an abstinence only lens, or that if homosexuality be spoken about at all that it MUST be touted as a bad, sinful thing... Ethically and morally I do not stand for education that includes hate and discrimination, and ignores the science. And did you know that most schools don't require that you have any degree or training in sexuality at all to teach sex ed? The way I see it, in order for me to teach to myself and my schools ethical standards I have to teach outside of the modern American schooling system! This also frees me up to teach classes and workshops to adults, utilizing all of the knowledge and passion that I have! While working within a school would give me access to working with more kids and teens on a daily basis, the restrictions it would place on me would deeply hinder the beautiful impact that sexuality education CAN have on people.
The answer depends entirely on what you mean by 'safe space'!
If you are asking whether or not this is an accepting and respectful space for LGBTQIA+ people, POC, indigenous individuals, or alternative relationship/family dynamics, the answer is YES ALL THE WAY!
But this is not a space where you will never feel uncomfortable, challenged, triggered or experience disagreement. The topics we discuss are difficult, complex, stigmatized, taboo... in order for me to promise to never upset or offend someone, I would genuinely have to stop teaching about sex ed. So, here's what I can promise- in my classes we will build layers of safety when applicable, identify support systems, use informed consent, welcome disagreement (even disagreeing with me), utilize movement, breathwork, breaks, feedback, discussion, connection, compassion, and even more to make these tricky topics a little easier to digest. Showing up to a class or workshop means that you've made some level of agreement to be brave and sit with discomforts as they arise. I can assure you that it will only facilitate your growth and understanding of yourself and others.
And most importantly; your autonomy is essential. If at any time you feel overwhelmed and need to take a break, step out, turn off your screen, or even leave the class entirely to preserve your wellness, I urge you to do so. You know better than anyone else what it takes to keep yourself healthy and safe ❤️
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